Fresh Starts

It's officially been a year since I moved to Costa Rica from Arizona, U.S. It's been a really intense year. A lot has happened, and a lot has changed. For some reason, this month has been a month of fresh starts, changes, and beginnings. I've spent a lot of time reflecting on myself, my art, and what the heck I'm doing.
There are a number of revelations I've had since moving, which I would like to share.

I learned that The United States is not the only country that has problems. Every country is a little messed up. And home has nothing to do with where you are currently residing. I discovered that I love tomatoes, fresh.

I found out that television really is useless and a waste of time. Without the television, I've found peace within myself, confidence in my appearance, and time for what truly matters.

I came to truly understand that societal pressures don't have to rule your life. Learn the rules, and then break them.

I also learned that deep breathing does wonders for stress and anxiety. And that nobody can give you happiness and freedom, you have to claim your right to them.

I've learned that it's okay to love yourself and do what really makes you happy.

I've learned how to run my own business. I taught myself how to take breaks, accept change, reward myself, and enjoy each day. I found out that I am much stronger than I seem.

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These days, I find myself spending most of my time here. I tend to answer emails, write blog posts, and do the typical admin tasks associated with self-employment. I rarely go into my studio unless it's to get a sheet of paper, a 4B graphite pencil, the pastel sticks, or what have you. I just find it so difficult to be inspired by my studio nowadays.
I have this horrid tendency to want things to be perfect. I am a perfectionist by nature, and it kills me and my artwork at times.
I want my studio to be perfect, and I know exactly what I want it to look like. And since I cannot produce this image into the reality I see, I stay as far away from that room at all costs.
I often tell myself that it's alright. Eventually, things will take off. At some point, I'll become successful, enjoy my job, and create wonderful things that bring more happiness into people's lives. I'll fall in love with my studio, and it will be my most favorite place in the world.

But for now, I write my little blog posts, create anklets and Mandala drawings.
In hopes that one of these days, I'll get the break-through I've been waiting for.